yipsterz!

emo

2006-06-27T04:19:00.000-07:00

i'm juz gonna pour everything out here..considering the fact no one actually sees this crap..

i reallie hate myself..i had the almost perfect girl..and i had to go all "jonathan"..beautiful..OREAL BERNADETTE GOH..wad did i do wrong..guess i had it coming..retribution..wad i deserve...i feel so lonely..
no one there for me...o great...i'm crying again...fucking wonderful..i whould hv considered myself lucky for getting a girl lyk tt..but noooo..i fucked it up again..

1st time we broke up...she broke up wid me over some stupid arguement...couldn't handle it without her..went crawling back to her..in the end we gt back together..06 June 2006

2nd time we broke up...i broke up wid her a few days after we gt back together..cuz we didn't tok at all...at all...n tot mayb i made a mistake by patching back wid her..15 June 2006..

2 weeks later..i realized..how much she meant to me..how much i loved her..but it was too fucking late...the conversation went somewhat like this..

O-Wad did u wanna tell me?..
J-i haven't gotten over u..
O-U still love me..
J-yea...
O-well..i got over u..now u can't?...tts ur problem..
O-i dun love u anymore..

cried lyk shit sfter tt...it was the worst time i cried for a girl..i guess now i noe wads it lyk to be on the receiving end..it sucks man..it sucks bad..now i under stand wad mel meant by "crying urself to sleep"...been doing tt e past 2 nights..

the sad thing is i feel so desperate...i didn't ask for her ta get back wid me..i begged her...she probably gonna tell everyone i noe..n i'm gonna lose every speck of dignity i ever had left...but some..i knew tt when i begged her...but i just didn't care..all i had in mind was to get her back..
haiii..

i just keep thinking abt all e gd times we had together..

i cried her on my back..all e way up to e park at munds hse...

i put her to sleep at mah birthday chalet..

how i 1st got her ta noe her n kept making her laugh on e fone..

the 1st movie we watched..i no stupid 2..

reallie can't stop crying now..y did this have to happen..i seriously feel like slashing myself just ta get my mind off these things..i seriously can't stop thinking off her..she wun even THINK about getting together with me...this has to be the worse break-up n side effect wid a girl ever...reallie need to get out of the hse..

Nothing's quite the same now.
I just can't say your name now.

But its not so bad,
You're only the best i ever had.
You don't want me back,
Youre just the best i ever had.

So you stole my world.
Now i'm just a phony.
Remembering the girl.
Leaves me down and lonely.

zzz

2006-06-10T00:00:00.000-07:00

ITS MY FIRST POST AFTER 7 MONTHS!!...haha..nic sort of "inspired" me ta start again..haha...gd place ta..EXPRESS MY INNER MOST FELT FEELINGS...haha...i'm shit bored lah!...this will b all...for nw...ciaoz!

I'm here without you baby,
But you're still on my lonely mind.
I think about you baby,
And i dream about you all the time.
I'm here without you baby,
But you're still with me in my dreams.
And tonight,
It's only you and me.
:)

1st time in a lng time...again..

2005-11-17T23:03:00.000-08:00

alrite man!!...i've started bloggin for the 1st time in a lng time!!!....again...hahaha...hopefully i can lyk...continue bloggin for a lnger time nw....hahaha...

shit...no idea wad ta blog nw....ahhh screw it...will blog 2morro...

1st time in a lng time...again..

2005-11-17T06:18:00.000-08:00

2005-09-16T11:05:00.000-07:00

waaaah...so much stuff hv been happening tiz whole week...fuck...

monday...kena caught for smoking...

tuesday...errr...nth..?...hahaha...

wendesday...wondering why i went wid her...

thursday...mum received letter frm skl abt da smokin thing...

friday...ITS RAINING CATS N SOGS OUT THERE RIGHT NW!!!...

fucking balls man...but a couple of gd stuff 2...nt gonna mention...hehehe...

2005-09-11T22:00:00.000-07:00

y does mah whole family b a fucking bitch???....

mah brother iz a fucking bastard who thinks talking to me lyk a fucking dickhead will help...

mah mum can b a bitch at times....

and mah dad...worse of fucking all...

fuck u nick!!!....ahhhhhh....fucking hate you!!.....

2005-09-02T20:22:00.000-07:00

i juz fuckin realised tt i only have 6 fucking posts...hahaha...pathatic...well...2day wasn't tt bad...can't exsectly said it rocks...skl waz fuckin boring as usual...

had ta give a speech cuz we gt 4th in da street-soccer tournament...man mah fucking legs n hands were fucking shaking lyk hell!!!!......so damn paiseh!!....was hopin no one wld notice...felt damn paiseh 2 cuz barely anyone clapped...hahaha...

o yea!!...i gt back mah result slips...fuck man...did lyk fuck...nt gonna show mah mum tho...hehehe...i'm gonna b so fucked when she knows....speakin of which...better go hide it nw...

met HER after skl...followed her all e way hme...stayed under her block for lyk...20 mins?...den went ta meet mundo...after tt daryl shawn n rivan came over ta mah place...played winning 11 abit den went down ta play soccer under mah block...we had ta shift places 3 times!!...2 fucking old uncle n an old granny came n scolded us...damn dickheads...came hme...and here i am...

nw i'm msgin her...hehe...damnnit...take so lng ta reply...zZz...

I always needed you,
I could never make it alone.

I am the man,
Who will fight for your honor.
I'll be the hero,
you're dreaming of.

heyz heytz

2005-08-31T18:30:00.000-07:00

OK!.....finally i'm bloggin again...sry took so long....feelin kindda hyper nw...o yea...sry so many of mah blog entries r missing...decided to move on...heez...its for the best...i noe it...

heres wads been happenin for a LONG time...
WE GOT 4TH IN THE STREET SOCCER TOURNAMENT!!...woohooo!!...but fuck man...gotta give a short speech as the team captain...balls lah...

mah coms fucked up man!!...now n den the whole fucking screen will turn blue....fucking shit man...now i have ta fucking format mah com...fucking fucked up man!!!...

I'd do anything
Just to hold you in my arms
To try to make you laugh
Cuz somehow I can't put you in the past
I'd do anything
Just to fall asleep with you
Will you remember me?
Cuz I know
I won't forget you

2005-08-13T10:19:00.000-07:00

why the fuck iz the timing 4 tiz so damn different????....

zZz

2005-07-17T07:06:00.000-07:00

i juz realized how lazy i am to update mah blog...hahaha...4got wad happened e past few dayz...but 2day waz reallie fun...

woke up kindda early ta go church n serve e 10.15 mass...saw clare acting retarded!!!...hehehe...sry clare..couldn't resist...slacked arnd wid mundo 4 abit n went ta his hse ta help him clean up...went ta church ta practice the tuifer wid rajiv..hahaha...reallie kool guy...

waz so fucking damn nervous during mass!!!...mah hands were literally shakin lyk a leaf...thank god i didn't cock up...had the support of mah frens...hehehe...after mass we went ta shawns place 4 his comfirmation party...slacked arnd abit...ate dinner at his place...played abit of soccer IN MAH LONG SLEEVE BLACK SHIRT N JEANS...damn psyco..hahaha...waz 2 damn tired...so had ta cme hme...so here i am...heheh...

sme times i wonder if he iz gone 4 the best...hate him lyk hell...so many ppl telling me not 2 hate him...how do i do tt??...haiii...after wad he has done...

Hold on if you feel like letting go
Hold on it gets better than you know
Don't stop looking, you're one step closer
Don't stop searching, it's not over
Hold on if you feel like letting go
Hold on it gets better than you know
Hold on

long day

2005-07-11T06:30:00.000-07:00

wad a day...damned mikey didn't cme...asshole...played soccer before skl n during recess!!...den went shopping wid rui ting...

1st we went ta city hall...ta take money frm tt stupid dad of mine...den we went ta PS..4 a lil lunch..I FINALLY GOT MY WHITE PANTS!!...hahaha...but i got exsectly the same one as mund...cldn't help it!!...it looked 2 damn good!!...hahaha...o well...got 2 shirts from flesh imp 2!...they were on sale!!...couldn't help it...crap!...i sound lyk a gerl!!...

den after we went ta get rui tings stuff...sme wallet 4 some1...den we went to 3 different slipper shops cuz she wanted to buy her slippers!!....den when we finally found a pair tt she LIKED!!...they they have it in her size...god i felt lyk hanging myself!!...urgh!!!....went hme...did sme work...n here i am!!...hahaha...haiii...keep thinking of you...

Saying 'I Love you' is not the words
I want to hear from you
It's not that I want you not to say
But if you only knew
How easy it would be to show me how you feel
More than words is all you have to do
To make it real then you wouldn't have to say
That you love me cause I'd already know

mah 1st official post!!...

2005-07-10T04:56:00.000-07:00

Hey guyz!!!....thx 4 comin ta mah blog!!...

hehe...damn bloody tired...woke up yeaterday at 9 ta play in a soccer tournement...reached mundo's hse at 10.30 only to help him dry his shirt!!...HAHAHA!!...kindda burnt his shirt using the hair dryier..haha...
after eating n delying...we only reached S.V.D.P. at 1...and our match started at 1.15...hahaha...
1st match: 1-1
2nd match:2-0(WE LOST)
yeap...2 a couple of young punks...haha...so...for losing...we koped their nice adidas ball.. :p.. waz damn bloody tired...but we still had games day for da servers at 3pm...SOCCER AGAIN!!...went hme at 6...den had to rush and change den went out wid sharon, haruhi, marcus, joanne n sah...mah cousins...(xept joanne)..came home and zZzZzZzZzZzZzZz....hahaha

next day...
sunday...
woke up early...went 4 mass at church...was so blur tt i wore mah ugliest pair of jeans i have...crap...so paiseh..went 2 lunch wid mah dad...felt so weird...didn't wanna tok 2 him...but i did it for mah mum...haiiii...

How could thi happen to me
I made my mistakes
I've got no where to run
The night goes on
As i'm fading away
I'm sick of this life
I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me

wad the fuck??

2005-07-08T08:31:00.000-07:00

HOW THE FUCK DO YOU FUCKING HELL USE THIS FUCKING THINGY??